And She's Out!

Last Thursday and Friday were rather tramatic for me.

If you've read read my blog at all, you may be familiar with how strongly adverse I am to needles. Well, it has been six years since I've last had labwork done because I always pass out or come close to passing out and I just don't like that feeling. (It's been even longer since I've had a full blown physcial). Well, Mitch and I would eventually like to start a family, and I know needles are a fact of life with that. Therefore, I forced myself to get a headstart and force myself to go get a physical.

I had high hopes that after six years, things would be different. I now think that it made things that much worse. I had built it up in my mind over that time period and from the point I received my labwork order on Thursday, all the way until Friday morning, I was a complete basket case. Major anxiety.

I wanted with every fiber of my being to just disregard the lab order or to put it off indefinitely.
But I made myself go. Mitch went with me. This was his first experience with me getting labwork done.

We got up at 6:30 a.m. on Friday and went in right away. If I stalled to took time to shower and get ready, my anxiety would just worsen. As it is, I was up every hour that previous night because of how anxious I was. When we got there, I was already crying. Mitch was really good about trying to help me regulate my breathing. When I was trying to explain my situation to the receptionist, I just was too emotional so Mitch took over. They took me in right away even though I didn't have an appointment. There was an appointment before me, but she wasn't a basket case, so they took me first.

I was completely fine when the lab technician initially started. I had my headphones in and plugged into Jeremy Camp on my iPhone. I had my water bottle. I had Mitch trying to distract me and reminding me to breath. However, about 30 seconds in, thats when my mind started to think about what was going on. I felt myself start to go. I tried to lean my head back against the wall. I started to take a drink out of my water bottle to prevent myself from going. And then I went. Passed out cold.

When I come to, the lab technician is done and I am soaking wet. Mitch informed me that when I went, I had my water bottle in my hand and squeezed it, dumping it all over myself. Also, I was clammy and had obviously broken out in a sweat right before passing out. As I was coming to, I thought I still had my headphones on because my hearing was only at 50%, but Mitch had removed them.

In the end, they got their blood. I just hate the feeling of passing out and the way that it makes me feel the rest of the day. This happened at 7:15 a.m. I didn't start to feel "normal" again until around 2:00 p.m. I get so disappointed in myself because I should be over this. Maybe if I don't wait six years again, things will be better next time. It didn't even really hurt! It's just my stupid mind that chooses to think of what it happening.....